Saturday, January 23, 2010

January 23, 2009

I got a really great headstart at the gym last week, but then developed a really bad case of bronchitis a few days ago and have been unable to work out... literally - if it was just "the sniffles" I'd suck it up and go anyway, but this cough comes from deep in my chest, and I've been having a hard time breathing, so I've had to take it easy... one thing Danny always says is "do not stop! under no circumstances - KEEP GOING!" so I am not quitting my healthy lifestyle because I got a cold, I'm just taking a few days to get well again, and then I'll go pound it at the gym some more!!!! :)

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Inspirational Quotes For You...

I love quotes - I find them all very inspiring, no matter what I'm dealing with!  :)  So here are a handful of quotes I have gathered, mostly from The Biggest Loser, and some from Season 8 Winner, Danny Cahill's Facebook Fan Page!  I have these quotes on note cards and I post them wherever it is convenient and visible :)

DO NOT STOP!  Under NO circumstances!!!  KEEP GOING!!!!  ~ Danny Cahill, Season 8 BL Winner

It's possible, if you BELIEVE it's possible. ~ Jillian Michaels, Trainer on the Biggest Loser

Focus on today.  Push yourself to finish that day's goal.  ~ Danny Cahill

The PAST does not define you.  The PRESENT does.  ~ Jillian Michaels

STAND UP and finish what you started. ~ Bob Harper, Trainer on the Biggest Loser

Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time.  We are the ones we've been waiting for.  We are the change we seek.  ~ Barack Obama

Don't waste energy on regrets.  Learn from your mistakes.  ~ Unknown

This is bigger than just me.  My kids need a healthy role model.  ~ Danny Cahill

I believe in you, so why don't you believe in yourself?  ~ Jillian Michaels

Shut up and just DO it!  ~ Bob Harper

At the end of the day, your health is your responsibility.  ~ Unknown

I know it's hard, and I know it hurts, but YOU CAN DO THIS.  ~ Bob Harper

Don't lose sight of what you want.  Don't lose sight of what you are ENTITLED to.  ~ Unknown

Is it worth it?  The question is, are YOU worth it?  ~  Unknown

Right now is what matters most.  Choose now whether you want to live or die.  ~ Unknown

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

January 20, 2009

Well all, it's been a wonderful day in the life of Melody Hansen - resident Biggest Loser ;) 

Last Friday night, my husband Wayne and I decided to join a gym.  Now, only those who know me best will know that about 5 years ago, I was what I like to refer to as a "Fitness World Poster Girl".  I had lost 115lbs. and was at my fittest EVER, and the gym I was a member of decided to use my success story in their advertising campaign.  I was already a pretty familiar face around the gym - everyone knew who I was, and I was very proud of my accomplishment, so I had no problem with being one of the "faces of Fitness World".  They used me in their ads for several months - if not a couple years - as people everywhere found my face in their newspapers, magazines, even on t.v.!  :)  It's probably one of my greatest accomplishments in my own mind.

So what could have possible went so wrong to send me back down the road to frustratedly fat? 

Well that's a story for another day, but in a nutshell, the pressure of being the 'barbie doll superwife" as I felt I was, was too much for me.  Trying to lose that imaginary "last 10 lbs" was so much pressure and so difficult for me, that I stopped trying... I don't exactly know why - it stopped being fun for me to go to the gym... as I slowly started putting some of that weight back on, I became embarrassed to show my face at the gym because Fitness World was still using me in their ads, and here I was, this fallen "hero" in so many people's eyes... okay, so maybe in reality it was only in my own eyes, but I felt defeated... I basically crashed under the pressure I put on myself and my ex put on me as well (again, long story).  I also had developed Fibromyalgia, so the less I worked out, the more pain I was in, and the harder it was for me to get back to the gym - or should I say, the easier it was to make an excuse not to go.  The less I went, the more my ex-fiance pushed me.  He figured if he gave me a hard enough "shove" in the "right" direction, then I would get out of my funk and get healthy again. 

When I finally left that relationship (when the bad started to outweigh the good - no pun intended), I had gained back over 60lbs of what I had lost.  But I needed time.  Time to heal from the emotional and psychological abuse from the relationship.  Time to get those "voices" out of my head that told me I wasn't good enough and no matter how hard I worked I would NEVER be good enough.  I needed time to get back to caring about MYSELF and just loving me for ME.  Not in someone else's vision of what I should be or what I should look like - but just focusing more on who I was inside.  So I decided to put the gym and even healthy eating completely out of my head "for a while".

The good news of that was I started to discover who I was on the inside - funny, spiritual, intelligent, attractive.  ATTRACTIVE!  on the inside???? Wow.  I had put so much of my attention on being beautiful on the outside, that I had lost sight of who I was on the inside.  At 220lbs, I met a guy who he thought I was gorgeous just the way I was.  And I was funny, and had brilliantly blue eyes that sparkled when I looked at him.  And he loved that about me.  He was the polar opposite of my ex-fiance, and he was everything I needed in a life partner.

So I married him!  :)

We've been together for 4 years now, and from the time I met him, I discovered I had the freedom to eat whatever I wanted, to do whatever I wanted, and I didn't have to "answer" to anyone but myself.  And I just needed to "wear" that suit for a while.  Needed to really let it sink in that I was no one's puppet.  I was in control of my own destiny. 

And today, I am happy, and cherish the fact that I am surrounded by positive people who love me for who I am.  The only unfortunate downside to that was that I have now packed on another 100lbs in the past 4 years.  A total of 160lbs from my fittest self. 

I am now heavier than I have ever been, and while I am blissfully happy in my marriage, and with my wonderful children (I have one 14 year old son of my own and 3 beautiful stepchildren I adore); my health has deteriorated.  Why?  Because I'm 320lbs and have Fibromyalgia, that's why!

I went from being body-builder fit to needing help getting off the couch.  I went from being lean and mean, to lazy and lethargic.  My right thigh goes numb every night when I get into bed, so I have to lie a certain way just to stop the discomfort.  I have sleep apnea to the point where I technically should probably have one of those breathing machines at night to ensure I don't stop breathing and die in my sleep.  I can't keep up with my children or my housework, and have taken to having naps every day, sometimes not being able to stay awake at all!  I was hospitalized in late 2008 due to stress and overexertion.  I have had doctors tell me that the only exercise I should be doing is housework and not to worry about anything else.  I have had doctors tell me "work on the emotional stuff before you worry about the physical stuff".  But every day I've been in such pain that I have to take medication to keep going.

So I'm totally hooped, right?


In late 2009, I found this really cool show on tv that I was curious about.  A bunch of really obese people get together at a fat camp, and work on their weight, and whoever loses the most weight wins a bunch of money.  It was entertaining to see the trainers screaming at these really obese people to work harder... but at the same time I felt bad for the contestants... I could relate... You may have heard of it but most peole I've talked to have never seen it - they should.  It's called "The Biggest Loser", and by the time I figured it out, it was Season 8.  How had I missed 7 seasons of this incredible show?  When I saw the contestants in the first episode with about 16 extremely obese people, I thought - there's no WAY they can lose that weight!!!  They might lose like 20-50 lbs, but they're not gonna get completely fit by being on a tv show.  Diets are scams.  Fitness programs are a fallocy.  It doesn't work.  Nothing works.  Not for me.

And then I watched... and I couldn't keep my eyes off the show.  Even my kids started getting into it, wanting to watch each and every episode.  Each week, the contestants lost TREMENDOUS amounts of weight!  They weren't on diet pills, they didn't have surgery - they did it by working out like a demon in the gym, and following a healthy meal plan that was really do-able!

The more I watched the show, the more I became inspired.  If that woman, who's husband and 3 children were killed in a car accident while she survived can do it, then so can I!  If that woman, who had to stand in front of all those obese people, and find out she was heavier than all of them, can do it, then so can I!  If that man, who left his dreams behind and became complacent in his life, can do it, then so can! 

I watched how the trainers did more than just train their bodies to be fit and teach them about healthy eating - they would dig in deep into these people's personal struggles to figure out how they got so fat in the first place - so they could make sure they never got fat again. 

And I got it.

I started to plan my own Biggest Loser Challenge.  I watched the entire season - (which is really only about 3 months long as they have seasons back to back without a hiatis in between which is awesome!)  and decided that I was going to change my life for good and I got my head back in the game.

Never mind that I am physically in pain every day.  I was sick of hurting all the time.  I finally recognized that the only way out of it is through it.  Work it out.

Never mind that I have 170lbs to lose, which is no easy task.  I had 115lbs to lose and I did it!  I can do this too.

If they can do it, so can I.

And so can you.

If this has inspired you to make a change in your life, do it.  Watch the Biggest Loser if it helps.  Motivate yourself every day.  Watch other people do more than you ever thought possible and come to that realization for yourself.  You can do it too.  When you're ready to give it your all.  No complaints.  No whining.  No excuses. 

If I can do it, so can you. 

God bless,
Biggest Loser in Progress ;)

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

January 12, 2009

Well, today is my second weigh in - I should have posted on January 5th when I did my weigh in, but I forgot - sorry!  :)  My first week I lost 6 lbs!!!  Can you believe it?  6 lbs in one week!!!  :)  I can't explain it, but I seemed to fall off the wagon for fitness after that day - but I still made extremely healthy food choices and experimented with different menu ideas.  Some of them worked better than others, like the chicken salad in a pita was waaaay better than the ground pork with whole wheat rotini!  blech!  The ground chicken chili was incredible!  and even the oven roasted parmesean cauliflower was pretty tasty, even though it was a tad drier than I'm used to... :) 

After a rough week exercise-wise, I reevaulated what went wrong for me.  I decided that I had stopped doing the BL workouts because they were only 20 minutes and only 50 calories burned, so it was a lot of work for not a lot... I decided that I would burn more calories working out at the gym, because clearly the voluntary walks at night with my husband weren't happening... so yesterday, I worked out for 25 minutes at the gym - on the treadmill and the indoor walking track, and burned over 300 calories!  yay!  I meant to do the BL workout yesterday anyway, but then found I had strained my rotator cuff in my left shoulder, so I decided it was more important to ensure I didn't injure myself and skipped it.  Was it an excuse?  I don't think so - as I do have a real fear of injuring myself by overdoing it, and then not being able to work out for a while, then losing my momentum... so I'd rather just get back on track the next day than risk it.  Long term gain, right?  :)  Anyway, so this morning, I went back to the gym and did 35 minutes of cardio - I lasted a whopping 3 1/2 minutes on the elliptical (which has always been my favorite cardio machine!) and decided I was losing my breath too quickly, so I moved over to the treadmill for 18 minutes, then had to go to the bathroom (all that water!) and did 3 laps around the track - for a total of about 35 minutes working out... :)  Not bad for day 2!  :) 

So today is weigh in day... I want to do the BL challenge today and then do a weigh in, but I'm not wanting to do it with a full tummy and I had a big bowl of the ground chicken chili for lunch and am still full (at 3:30pm) :)  I don't know if I will have lost any weight this week - I didn't exercise except for the last 2 days, but I did eat healthy foods.  That being said, I know that (aside from working out) my other biggest challenge is eating ENOUGH calories!  I am truly just not hungry enough for all those calories!  But I also figure I'm not burning as many calories, so as long as I try to eat at regular intervals, that will boost my metabolism.  I need to work on eating in the morning.  That has been very difficult for me for a very long time - I actually feel NAUSEOUS when I eat in the mornings.  Maybe that's cuz of my medication - I dunno.  But one thing I need to really work on is stop eating after dinnertime.  I haven't been very consistent about that, and wonder if that might contribute to my lack of hunger in the mornings... perhaps (I sit here now and think...) if I stopped eating earlier in the evening, (say 6pm?) then I'd be really hungry by the morning, and that would help reset my hunger cycle?  Yeah!  I'm going to make that my goal for this coming week. 

Anyway, I'll save this post and update it after I weigh in... :)  Wish me luck!

Update:  So I did the Biggest Loser challenge today and didn't win.  Then I did my weigh in on the game, but being a video game, it screwed up, and before I had the chance to get on the scale, it said it couldn't read it, and entered my weight loss as 0lbs.  :(  So I had to restart my game, and when I weighed myself in, it said I weight 329lbs again!!!!!!!!  ARGHHH!!!  There is no WAY I have gone back to my old weight... I'm frustrated and disappointed... and both Wayne and Cody say that the game is incorrect.  I don't know if it is or not, but I had to restart my whole profile, which really sucks.  It feels like the first two weeks didn't even count :(  But I can't let that feeling overtake me to the point where I give up.  Danny Cahill (winner of Biggest Loser Season 8) told me personally (when I messaged him on Facebook) "Do not stop!  Under no circumstances - KEEP GOING!!!"... so I must!  :)  Because I truly look up to Danny - he lost 239 lbs in 6 months on the Biggest Loser and I believe that he is just like me.  If he can do it - with his various health ailments, then so can I!  And to have the ability to talk to him directly is a HUGE inspiration to me!  Now some of you may say "he's a celebrity now - why would he talk to you?"  Well, I guess you haven't watched the Biggest Loser, have you?  These guys get so pumped up when they realize they are inspiring a NATION, that they want to help others who are just like they were.  And as far as being a celebrity?  He had his 15 minutes of fame, yes, but he won't be on Oprah anytime soon :)  Anyway, he is my inspiration, and if he can do it - so can I!!!! :)

Okay, so that's my rant for today.  Thanks for reading :)


Thursday, December 31, 2009

December 30, 2009

Well, today was an awesome start!  I did a half of a workout (Cody did the other half) and a challenge plus warm ups and cool downs on the BL Wii game.  VERY cool game - definitely made me work as hard as I could, and I am very proud of myself today.  Also started looking at my BL 30 Day Jumpstart book, which asked me to plan my week, so I'm going to do it here cuz it's easiest and I will be able to continue to add to it daily.

Starting Weight:  329 lbs.

December 31, 2009

My reason for wanting to lose weight today is to reduce my physical pain, to live a long and healthy life for my husband and my children, and to be able to move around with ease.  I know it's not easy, but I also know it is WORTH IT!

  • Clean out the fridge and cupboards of any crap foods and expired foods.
  • Plan a menu for Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday.
  • Grocery shop for healthy foods for the remainder of the week.
  • Complete an entire "Light" workout on BL Wii game, as well as one challenge.
  • Make an effort to make healthy food and beverage choices today.

Have a case of water in the cars at all times in case you get thirsty.  Keep a pack of gum on you in case you get a sweet urge, and find some healthy snacks you can keep in the car in case you get the munchies...